Sickness, Depression, and Bouncing Back

This past week, I have been dealing with some issues. Last Wednesday I got a head cold that was killer. I am still fighting the sinus effects of it. That illness brought some stark realizations to me. I have a tendency to get really down when I don’t feel good. I was sick, so I was constantly checking my book sales. Why? Probably because I am a glutton for punishment.

I haven’t done any advertising lately, and I haven’t put out any new books in several months. With this in mind, I am not sure why I thought my sales would be higher than they are. This brought me to a low place. I was feeling sick already, and thus, feeling sorry for myself. I know this is a dangerous thing for me. Anytime I feel the need to pity myself, I take it too far and spiral into a micro-depression that eventually grows until I feel crippled.

My sales, (or lack thereof) and my sickness, gave me dark thoughts. I started my What If? game and found that it wasn’t the inspirational “let’s write a story” type of What If? game. It was the “reality is here to smack you down” type of What If? game. I was forced to consider, What if I never become a successful author? What if every work I put out there receives no accolades? What if I am wasting my time?

I am sure there are other authors that come to this point and realize that they either cannot continue or decide that it is not what they want to do. I am not in that crowd. These questions forced me to accept the possibility. Maybe, I never will become a famous author. It is possible that I will receive no accolades for my writing. However, that last I cannot accept, I am not wasting my time. I say this because, even if I sell nothing, that is not why I chose to write. I chose to write because I want to share the stories in my head. I want to share the personalities I create. My imagination will never let me rest peacefully if I stopped writing.

I gave up writing once and it killed the life in me. I will not give up again. So, again, maybe I never become a famous author, maybe no one buys my books, maybe my sales plummet into oblivion, but maybe none of that happens. In realizing that anonymity is a possibility, realizing that all of the above is a possibility, I came to realize that the opposite is also a possibility. If the opposite is a possibility, I must strive for it.

“Success is not a destination, it’s a journey.” – Zig Ziglar
“The person who gets the farthest is generally the one who is willing to do and dare. The sure-thing boat never gets far from shore.” – Dale Carnegie
“Success means having the courage, the determination, and the will to become the person you believe you were meant to be.” – George Sheehan
“God gives every bird a worm, but he does not throw it in the nest.” – Sweedish Proverb
“When a man is willing and eager, the gods join in.” – Aechylus

Today, I am striving for it. I am bouncing back and kicking depression in the face. IN THE FACE! Until next time folks.


Your Friendly Neighborhood Author,


DJ Morand


PS. I really hope Silva won that fight from the featured image or this whole post is for naught. LOL, or is it merely the thought that counts?

2 thoughts on “Sickness, Depression, and Bouncing Back

  1. Thanks for sharing this, man. We’ve all been there. It sucks! But you’re right, we do it because we love it, and we won’t stop, simply because we can’t. So hang in there! Your sales will increase in time, for sure! : D

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